Bisexual Killjoy

S4E2: Bi+ Activism and the Long Haul with Robyn Ochs

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! This week, we’re exploring what it means to be a Bi+ activist who’s in it for the long haul with the one and only Robyn Ochs as our guest. This Bi+ visibility month we’re focused on sustaining our efforts by honoring their inherent fluidity. We discuss how Bi Women Quarterly began and its transformation throughout the years, the importance of crafting intentional legacy, and what happens when Bi+ voices are centered as a collective. From the lives recorded in Getting Bi to those in RECOGNIZE, we know that history is remembered when we’re together.
Robyn Ochs is an educator, speaker, grassroots activist, and editor of Bi Women Quarterly and two anthologies: the 42-country collection Getting Bi: Voices of Bisexuals Around the World and RECOGNIZE: The Voices of Bisexual Men. Her writings have been published in numerous bi, women’s studies, multicultural, and LGBTQ+ anthologies, and she has taught courses on LGBTQ+ history & politics at Tufts University, MIT, and Northern Vermont University. Among other things, she crafted the definition of bisexuality that is used by many bi+ activists around the world: “I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge in myself the potential to be attracted — romantically and/or sexually — to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree.” Robyn is deeply committed to intersectional and sustainable activism, to working with others to build coalitions across identities and across social movements, to supporting emerging leaders, and to learning and growing. She is particularly interested in bi+ health, the experiences of bi+ people in the workplace, the global bi+ movement, bi+ elders, and bi and LGBTQIA+ youth. An activist for 50 years (so far), she is in it for the long haul. In 2024, she was named an LGBT History Icon. 
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
As always, we want to hear from you! You can chat with us on our Discord Server, send us a message, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Bi All Accounts: An Anthology of Bi+ Voices, Volume 1. Edited by Bailey Merlin, Bi+ Book Gang. 2025. Order your copy today!
Getting Bi: The Voices of Bisexuals from Around the World, Second Edition 2009. Edited by Robyn Ochs and Sarah E. Rowley.
RECOGNIZE: The Voices of Bisexual Men, 2014. Edited by Robyn Ochs and H. Sharif Williams.
Bisexural Resource Center: https://biresource.org/ 
Bi Women Quarterly: http://www.biwomenboston.org/ 
Where to Find Robyn Ochs
Website: https://www.robynochs.com/ 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pixel.ochs/ 
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/robynochs 
Threads: https://www.threads.net/@robynochs 
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/robynochs.bsky.social 
Sound engineer: Richie Smith

S4E1: Bisexual Killjoys Lost in History

S4E1: Bisexual Killjoys Lost in History
Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! Season 4 opens with a reckoning: what happens when your history keeps getting erased? Bailey and Jace reflect on how far the podcast has come, why bi+ history matters, and what it means to build legacy in a world that constantly pushes us to the margins. From Stonewall to the AIDS crisis, from forgotten activists to speculative bisexual icons, we’re taking a messy, curious, and determined dive into the cracks where our stories have been buried.
In this episode, we talk about how bi+ erasure shows up in history books, archives, and movements that claim to be “for all queers,” but consistently leave us out. We trace six generations of bi+ activism, dig into the blessing and curse of being a decentralized community, and wrestle with what legacy-building actually means. Spoiler: it’s hard, it’s frustrating, and it’s essential. 
This season is all about history, erasure, and resilience. Our goal isn’t to create a perfect archive but to give bi+ listeners a sense of place, belonging, and possibility. Allies, you’ll hear concrete ways to show up beyond rainbow reposts. Bi+ folks, this one’s for you: your history is here, your community is here, and you deserve to see yourself in it.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram.
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week (or since we saw you last)? We want to hear from you! Chat with us on our Discord Server, send us a message, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Bi All Accounts: An Anthology of Bi+ Voices, Volume 1. Edited by Bailey Merlin, Bi+ Book Gang. 2025. Order your copy today!
Bisexual Resource Center: https://biresource.org/ 
Foucault, Michel. The History of Sexuality. Pantheon Books, 1978.
Sedgwick, Eve. Epistemology of the Closet. University of California Press, 1990.
Sound engineer: Richie Smith

S3E9: Pride in the Messy Middle

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! Here we are at the end of another season, and boy, are our arms tired. We ran the gamut from mental health, from race to economics, spirituality, class, parenthood, and neurodiversity. And by talking about these big topics, we were able to learn more about ourselves and each other. In this episode, we recap the season, meditate on community, and make predictions on Pride.
We’re off for the summer but are already planning for season 4. Until we meet again, keep being a Bisexual Killjoy. Stay bisexual, and stay strong.  
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Bisexual Killjoy Substack: https://www.bisexualkilljoy.com/ 
Bisexual Killjoy Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/join/BisexualKilljoy 

S3E8: Liminality as Labor: Class and Bi+ Survival with Alicia Ortiz

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! What does it mean to survive as a bi+ person in a world structured by class? In one of our most expansive and layered conversations to date, Bailey and Jace are joined by educator, activist, and musician Alicia Ortiz to unpack the taboo of talking about class, especially in queer spaces. Together, we explore how class functions as a sticky object in our lives, how bi+ people uniquely navigate systems of poverty and power, and why the myth of meritocracy doesn’t hold up under scrutiny.
From identity politics and the legacy of the Combahee River Collective to Olúfẹ́mi Táíwò’s Elite Capture, we examine how movements are co-opted, how queerness is commodified, and how bi+ people are often excluded from both straight and gay narratives of respectability. We also dig into how upward mobility—whether through the military, education, or sex work—is often pathologized, and why coalition-building is essential for a liberated future.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Dalke, Anne. “Classism and the Queer Community.” Serendip Studio, 2013. https://serendipstudio.org/exchange/critical-feminist-studies-2013/ep/web-event-2-classism-and-queer-community 
Gaskins, TY. “Black Dandyism Explained—From Its 18th-Century Roots to Modern-Day Expressions.” Vogue. 8 May 2025.  https://www.vogue.com/article/what-is-black-dandyism 
Stop Soldier Suicide. “Veteran Suicide Stats.” https://stopsoldiersuicide.org/vet-stats 
Táíwò, Olúfẹ́mi O. Elite Capture: How the Powerful Took Over Identity Politics (And Everything Else). Chicago: Haymarket Books. 2022.
Where to find Alicia Ortiz
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/alicia.vida.ortiz 
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alicia_vida_ortiz/
Classes: https://impactboston.org/in-person-classes/

S3E7: Too Much & Never Enough: Being a Bi+ Woman

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! What does it mean to become a bi+ woman in a world that says you’re either too much or not enough? In this episode, we dive deep into the messiness of womanhood, gender socialization, and bi+ identity. Grounded in Simone de Beauvoir’s iconic quote, “One is not born, but rather becomes, woman,” we unpack the violence of gender norms, internalized misogyny, femmephobia, and the social construction of sex itself.
We talk about the personal and political stakes of being bi+ and femme in a world that demands your compliance—and punishes your refusal. From the erasure of bi+ women in relationships to survival strategies shaped by patriarchy, this conversation is a powerful reminder that womanhood isn’t a fixed truth; it’s a battlefield of expectations, agency, and becoming.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Beauvoir, Simone de. The Second Sex. Vintage Classics, 2015.
Stone, Alison. An Introduction to Feminist Philosophy. Polity Press, 2007.
Ward, Jane. The Tragedy of Heterosexuality. NYU Press, 2020.

S3E6: Sacred Spaces, Queer Faces with Dr. Samantha Costa

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! In this episode, “Sacred Spaces, Queer Faces,” we sit down with Dr. Samantha Costa to explore the fraught and fascinating relationship between bi+ identity and faith. From the lingering trauma of “pray the gay away” ideologies to the quieter pressures to suppress bi+ness in religious spaces, we unpack how bi+ people navigate spiritual lives in the face of erasure and exclusion. Together, we ask: Is it possible to hold onto faith without organized religion? Can bi+ people build spiritual practices that reflect their whole selves? And what might a theology of in-betweenness look like in a world that demands certainty? This conversation honors the sacred in the liminal and invites listeners to imagine new forms of queer belonging, both spiritual and communal.
Samantha Costa is a queer non-binary scholar, survivor, and storyteller exploring the sacred in the wake of religious trauma. A professor and social researcher, their work focuses on LGBTQIA+ mental health, gender identity, and spiritual reclamation. Raised Catholic in an Irish-Italian family and later disowned alongside their transgender parent, Dr. Costa, now helps others navigate the long road from exile to integration. They earned their PhD in Philosophy and Religion from CIIS and developed the “Seven Freedom Milestones” to map queer journeys toward spiritual wholeness.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Douglas, Ezzy, and Fielder, Bronwyn. “Ritual and liminality: Bisexuality within Christianity and Paganism.” Bisexuality, Religion and Spirituality: Critical Perspectives, eds. Andrew Kam-Tuck Yip and Alex Toft. 2020.
Toft, Alex. Negotiating sexuality and spirituality: The lived experiences of bisexual persons.” Bisexuality, Religion and Spirituality: Critical Perspectives, eds. Andrew Kam-Tuck Yip and Alex Toft. 2020.
Where to find Samantha Costa
Website: https://samcostaspace.wordpress.com/ 
TikTok: @thespiritualstudent
Threads: @the_spiritual_student
Bluesky: @spiritualstudent.bsky.social

S3E5: Parenting While Bi+ with Ellen Davenport-Pleasance

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! In this episode, we explore the intersection of bi+ identity and parenting, a topic many of our listeners have been eager for us to dig into. To help us navigate this conversation, Dr. Ellen Davenport-Pleasance, a leading researcher on bi+ parenting and director of the Bisexual Research Group, joins us. Together, we unpack how bi+ parents experience minority stress, family dynamics, and cultural socialization, and why bi+ people are both more likely to be parents and yet remain underrepresented in queer narratives. We also talk about how bi+ parents can foster affirming environments for their kids, the role community plays as a protective factor, and what bi+ parents should keep in mind when building supportive networks. Whether you're a bi+ parent, thinking about parenthood, or just curious about the unique intersections of bi+ identity and family life, this episode is for you.
Ellen Davenport-Pleasance is a bisexual researcher who recently finished her PhD at University College London. Her PhD focused on families with bisexual+ mothers, and explored minority stress, mental health, and family functioning, using a mixture of qualitative and quantitative methods. Prior to her PhD, she completed an MPhil in Psychology at the University of Cambridge, during which she conducted a qualitative study of bisexual+ mothers, focusing on how they came out to their children and their queer socialization practices. As well as conducting research, Ellen has taught social science/ psychology at four universities in the UK and is the director of the Bisexual Research Group.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Davenport-Pleasance, E. (2024). “Bi-Invisibility in Academia; the Intentional and Accidental Erasure of Bi + Parents in Research and Recommendations for Future Research.” Journal of Bisexuality, 24(4), 534–573. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299716.2024.2361340
Davenport-Pleasance, E., & Imrie, S. (2022). “How Do Bi+ Mothers Talk with Their Children about (Their) Bisexuality+?” LGBTQ+ Family: An Interdisciplinary Journal, 18(4), 319–338. https://doi.org/10.1080/27703371.2022.2091073 
Irving, A.J., illustrated by Cynthia Alonso. The Bi Book. Random House. 2025.
Where to find Ellen Davenport-Pleasance
Website: https://www.bisexualresearch.com/
IG: @bisexualresearch

S3E4: Bisexual Killjoys at the Intersection of Bi+ Boulevard and Neurodiverse Avenue

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! In this episode, we’re diving into a conversation many of you have asked us to cover: what it means to be both neurodiverse and bi+. As bi+ folks with ADHD, we’re not just talking theory; we’re sharing our lived experiences, the lack of affirming research at this intersection, and the powerful stories you’ve shared.
We’re exploring how neurodivergence and bi+ness co-exist, how pathologizing narratives have failed us, and why we need more affirming, participant-driven research. We ground our conversation in two of Alex Toft’s articles and use them as a jumping-off point to discuss invisibility, identity stacking, hypersexualization, and the nonconforming ways neurodiverse bi+ folks show up in the world.
We also asked our listeners to share what it’s like navigating this intersection, and as always, y’all delivered. From grappling with identity labels to dealing with social norms that don’t quite fit, this episode is about claiming space, rejecting deficit-based thinking, and embracing the fullness of neurodiverse bi+ identity.
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Toft, Alex. (2023). ‘These Made-Up Things Mean Nothing to Me’: Exploring the Intersection of Autism and Bisexuality in the Lives of Young People. Journal of Bisexuality, 23(3), 229–249. https://doi.org/10.1080/15299716.2023.2214134
Toft, Alex, & Ward, Beth. (2022). A Young Disabled LGBT+ Researchers Group: Working Collaboratively to Explore the Lives of Young Autistic LGBT+ Persons. Sociological Research Online, 27(4), 1104-1112. https://doi.org/10.1177/13607804221125233 
“Sick Shit” by Together Pangea (2014)

S3E3: Queering Race and Bi+ Identity with Zori Paul

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! In this episode, we explore the intersection of bi+ identity and race, unpacking how structural oppression, racial stereotypes, and exclusion from mainstream queer spaces affect bi+ people of color. To guide us through this conversation, we’re joined by the amazing Dr. Zori Paul. We’re zeroing in on how bi+ oppression intersects with racial oppression, the impact of colorblindness in queer spaces, and the importance of creating affirming, community-driven spaces for queer people of color. We’re also talking about resilience through affirmation and coalition-building and how bi+ people of color can find and cultivate spaces that fully recognize and support their identities.
Zori Paul is a Licensed Professional Counselor, counselor educator, and researcher. Her work focuses on intersecting marginalized identities, particularly bisexual+/queer people of color. Her recent research focuses on exploring the impacts of microaffirmations with bisexual+ women of color and queer people of color. She also co-hosts Therapy on a Tangent, a podcast where two therapists nerd out about their geeky passions and mental health. 
 
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Follow us on @bisexualkilljoy on Instagram or email us at bisexualkilljoy@gmail.com. 
Resources
Therapy on a Tangent → https://linktr.ee/therapyonatangentpod
Monica A. Ghabrial & Lorie E. Ross. (2018) Representation and Erasure of Bisexual People of Color: A Content Analysis of Quantitative Bisexual Mental Health Research. Psychology of Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity, 5:2, 123-142, DOI: 10.1037/sgd0000286
Journal of Bisexuality → https://www.tandfonline.com/journals/wjbi20 
Where to find Zori Paul
Website: https://www.zoriapaul.com/   
IG/Threads: @AmberInsights
BlueSky: @zoriamber.bsky.social

S3E2: Bi+ Minds Matter with Mimi Hoang

Welcome back to Bisexual Killjoy! This week, we’re diving into bi+ mental health with a very special guest: Dr. Mimi Hoang. In honor of Bi+ Health Awareness Month, we discuss the mental health disparities bi+ folks face, the lack of research on bi+ BIPOC communities, and why it’s critical to have bi+ affirming mental health professionals. We also explore the role of community as a protective factor, how bi+ activism has shaped national advocacy efforts, and practical steps bi+ folks can take to access care and support.
Dr. Mimi Hoang is an internationally recognized psychologist, life coach, public speaker, and community organizer specializing in the LGBTQ+ and Asian American and Pacific Islander communities. Since the 1990s, she has co-founded three organizations for bisexual, pansexual, and fluid ("bi+" if you’re nasty) individuals - the Los Angeles Bi+ Task Force (LABTF), amBi Los Angeles, and Fluid at UCLA. Dr. Mimi has authored multiple publications and earned a seat at the landmark 2013 White House Bisexual Community Roundtable, which sparked her focus on bi+ affirmative counseling and mental health. Her steadfast leadership has earned her multiple awards and recognitions, including being one of Go Magazine's "100 Women We Love" and being named “One of the Most Significant Women in the Bisexual Movement.” 
Hosted by bi+ academics, writers, and advocates Bailey Merlin and Jace Rios Rivera, Bisexual Killjoy talks all things bisexual (pansexual, omnisexual, plurisexual, and overall bi+ness) because bisexuality isn’t a phase; it’s a phenomenon. Get even more Bisexual Killjoy content by subscribing to our Substack, joining our Patreon, and following us on Instagram. 
Were you a Bisexual Killjoy this week? We want to hear from you! Send us a message, chat with us on our Discord server, or email us at hello@bisexualkilljoy.com  
Buy us a Coffee or leave us a tip here.
Resources
Living in Color Therapy: https://www.livingincolortherapy.com 
B+ Well Conference 2025: https://labitaskforce.org/b%2B-well-conference 
Where to find Mimi Hoang
Website: https://drmimihoang.com/index.html 
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrMimiHoang/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmimihoang